Getting out of myself. #identity #vacation

I’ve really let myself get out of routine this vacation. As a result I’m not keeping my creative flow constantly moving like I try to do throughout a regular work week. I’m not lamenting. I do this on purpose whenever I go on vacation. I take up some old bad habits for a few days. I take long road trips to places that I’ve never been to.* I slack off on any writing projects (including this blog) nor do I pick up a guitar. I’ve barely done any reading this week. I spent most of my time at home lounging around. It’s a bit hot to move much to start with, but I don’t think I really wanted to in the first place.

I not only let myself get out of routine. It feels as if I’ve let myself out of… myself. By changing my lifestyle for a little while I start to go through some sort of self-inflicted identity crisis. It’s healthy sometimes to step back and examine myself. But in this case I dropped several elements of what I attach to my identity and caught a glimpse of what I really am as a person. This might be a practice that I want to take up from time to time via a more formalized method. I only got a taste of what I’m talking about this week.

I’m contemplating not writing any more blog posts until I get back into the swing of things on Monday. I know that I’ve been slacking off on this blog recently. Still, I don’t think that I’m going to be too productive over the weekend. If something comes to me I’ll write it. But should I force myself to come up with something? I’m tired of feeling like I have to “give myself permission” to not write blog posts. At the same time I’m tired of not writing blog posts on a daily basis like I used to. I can’t believe that I’ve run out of ideas.

That doesn’t change my mind when it comes to not writing until Monday, when I restart my routine. I want to enjoy my time off as much as possible. I also want to see where this “getting out of myself” idea takes me. Now that I’ve examined it, it might not work when forced. But it will be interesting to see where it leads regardless.

*By the way, I don’t have much to report on my trip to New Brunswick this year. In order to cover as much land as possible, I took the highway. As a result, I believe I missed a lot of scenic, rural areas that I would want to see. I also don’t have any pictures to post here, either. I can say that I went, however, and that’s the main thing. I’m debating whether or not I want to take a weekend trip to Montreal at some point this year. I didn’t realize just how close I live to it. But I doubt I can afford it and besides, going through customs is a pain in the ass.

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