I don’t know why but I’ve been incredibly tired this week. Every day since Wednesday I’ve come home after work, had dinner and then went to bed for a few hours. I regain a little bit of energy before I go to bed but not a lot. I don’t feel it at work. It only hits me once I get home and have dinner. Now that I’m not getting overtime I’m eating my dinner an hour earlier than what I’m used to. Could that simple change in my diet have something to do with my fatigue? I still have a hard time getting to sleep on time. Maybe a combination of the two has something to do with it.
Either way, it’s needless to say that I haven’t gotten much done as far as revising my manuscript this week. I’ve done as much as I could but I can only do so much intellectual work when I’m dead tired. (I’m using the term “intellectual” in a broad sense, of course. I await judgement from potential readers in the future.) Even this blog post is a chore this evening. I’m not as sleepy as I have been all week but I still have a hard time focusing on what I’m doing.
However, this weekend I pledge to blaze through editing the book. I don’t mean for this to “make-up” my lack of work nor do I intend to justify not doing so much this week. Truth be told I planned on doing so anyway. I don’t have any plans this weekend aside from going out once or twice to eat. Even then, I could take my work with me. So I didn’t feel too bad about lying in bed in the middle of the afternoon, too tired to go to sleep.
Am I worried that I’m not going to meet my goal of finishing this step of the drafting process by the end of the month? Well, I’m trying to not get worried. The distress may distract me from the work. But just saying “I’ll do as much as I can” is getting to not be enough. I will finish by the end of the month. It doesn’t matter if I get to the point when I have to type up my changes. That isn’t as important to me as actually taking the time to decide on them. Besides that, I forgot that I did have a few other things that’s going to eat up computer time this month. As soon as I get my W-2 form from work I’m going to have to do my taxes. That always takes longer than necessary. I also have to re-familiarize myself with the equipment to record my album next month.
It sounds like I’m making excuses ahead of time. I am good at that but this time I’m simply stating that I keep setting unrealistic goals for myself sometimes. If I have to make any excuses they should relate to any reasons for not getting any further by now. Then again, I could be getting too hard on myself. I might have had a slow period but I am working on this damn thing, which is what counts.